As Alyce would say, "Jeesh!" I'm pooped. It's been an exhausting day. This evening we had Alyce and Walt over for dinner, and if I must say so myself, it went beautifully. The ants put on a virtuoso performance, and all things considered, I think we made our points. We'll have to see how things develop...Did I mention about the drought in Chapel Hill? We got a letter from the Macklers containing a picture of University Lake -- practically all dried-up. Sure is glad we's up here!..Had lunch at El Cid with Aaron, Yvonne and Dorothy. Having them group me with them when they talk about the aides is kind of an unsettling experience. I'm beginning to feel myself drift across the fence...Meeting with the bank went fairly well. Looks like with joint sponsorship of the program we just might make it!
September 2nd
God do I feel shitty. Hope I'm not coming down with the Haven Flu. I was over there for awhile today, trying to get someone to do a design for the workshop invitation. Gail volunteered (bless her) and I spent some time discussing details. Seems like at least half of the staff is out with the bug, and Lillian was coming down with it while I was there. It always feels strange to visit 26; so much has happened in the course of a year. During my talk with Gail, Al and then Phyllis and Ruth Ann stopped by and we had a pleasant chat. (Al still is a sexy son-of-a-gun.)...Had lunch again today at El Cid with Dorothy. She kinda reminds me of Jackie Hess for some reason, maybe because they both come off as sort of tragic figures.
September 3rd
Holy cow. Do you know what today is? iIt was an entire year ago, on this very day, that we moved to Paramus, NJ. Unbelievable. I "celebrated" the occasion by remaining home in bed, determined to evade the Flu and stay well for next week. After yesterday's bopping around in the cold chill and rain, I just didn't want to take any chances. I mostly slept, and caught up on some reading. Right now I'm into a mystery novel of Sally's. Dorothy stopped by this evening; unfortunately Gail's drawing was a bit too complicated and not done to scale, so Don agreed to take a stab at it. She'll come back Monday night to pick it up...I can't believe how early it's getting dark these days. My mind just won't accept that it's not still July or something...Don's getting good at the organ and I'm getting jealous.
September 4th
Eight months later and Kerri Dog finally decides to go into heat again. Yay team. This time, of course, we were expecting it, and at the first sight of blood today we popped her into the kitchen. She seems to be doing just fine, but I feel bad about keeping her in there. And then again, there's the probable false pregnancy to look forward to in 3 months. Wonder when we'll get to breed her...Kind of a dull day -- read, watched TV mostly. Don worked on the new bike he's putting together. It's nice looking, but I sure as hell wish his discipline was greater. Hopefully he'll look into biofeedback when we return from the beach...Sue and Mara will be joining us there next weekend. How 'bout that?..Played 2 games of backgammon this evening. Am really getting into it.
September 5th
Saw a good movie this evening, upon Don's recommendation -- "The Third Man". I usually get impatient with those old black and white spy-type stories, but this one was intriguing...I've been thinking about camp a lot recently, probably because I've been having so many raspberry-flavored things. The taste of raspberry immediately brings me back to the ol' raspberry patch near Cabin 3, and morning flag-raisings, and the Farm House and so forth and so on...Today was fairly satisfying in terms of accomplishments. I was pissed at Don for awhile for spending so much time on the bike, but he did get the blind on the back door up and the drawing for Dorothy done. Wish he'd shave already...Alyce can sure be depressing with her Paramus Voice of Doom and Gloom, but it was nice of her to cut me those roses.
September 6th -- Labor Day
And so the summer come unofficially to an end. Once again there were the Labor Day sales, barbeques, Jerry Lewis telethon. Don and I worked, mostly -- doing laundry, dishes, straightening. Walt vented the dryer (finally!) and caulked around the kitchen door. We went out for awhile to try and find a beach umbrella. No dice, but we did drop off some library books and deliver the "Footsteps" illustration to Dorothy. Don really did a nice job on it. Interestingly, I was somewhat stoned from the old frozen brownies that I had had for dessert earlier. I was sure surprised that they still worked, but they did enough to give me the munchies and to perhaps make me look a little out of it to Dorothy..."Yellow Submarine" was on again tonight; I love it! Alyce brought us a blackberry dessert!
September 7th
I can't believe we're really here. Can you hear that ocean?! Our bedroom faces onto it and the sea breeze comes right through the 2 large windows. Wow. I'm so excited. The Island itself is pretty much deserted, relative to the summer season, and that suits us just fine. Sun, surf and sand for a whole week. and right after being in the moountains, too! I think that we're two very lucky people...Being at the beach brings back my old fantasies of California summers and surfers -- the stuff of which all those old songs are made. Will I ever grow up?
Nope. ;-)
September 8th
We swam and sunned mostly today, while trying to dodge the unbelievable number of vicious flies on the beach. No one seemed to know where they had come from or why they were there, but I sure wish they'd beat it. And guess what, Ma? I got bit by a crab in the water!
September 9th
What a marvelous, sun-shiny beach day. The feeling of being able to totally unwind; to just bask in the sunshine with butterflies flitting about, and the cries of seagulls and the pounding of the waves in your ears. Like nothing else even existed. Or ever will...Had fresh fish for dinner from the local market. Delicious. Everything tastes better at the ocean it seems. The Island itself is sparsely populated these days. The few people on the beach are mostly middle-aged or older and in that respect it's kind of a strange situation. I associate coming to the shore with summer at its height -- including crowds, noise, summer songs on the radio, etc. Off-season is more peaceful, but it takes some getting used to.
September 10th
What a crazy, crazy night. Sue and Mara finally showed up at 9:30, long after we had given up hope of them evercoming. Seeing Mara again after all these years was a real freak-out, but after some wine, grass and hysterical reminiscing, she seemed a lot more familiar. The reminiscing was really a riot -- it's such a blast to recall things that you haven't thought of in ages...Well, our luck with the weather finally turned today, and it rained and turned colder. Once the downpour stopped, we walked on the beach, which was a neat experience. The water was kinda warm, and the dark/light contrast gave everything a greater impact. I love the ocean -- makes you really philosophical.
September 11th
Talk about a perfect day. and what a surprise. All day yesterday we listened to weather reports predicting a "cool and partly sunny" day. Lo and behold, we get up this morning and are greeted by a cloudless sky, bright sunshine and a delightful breeze. Who could ask for more? After a day on the beach, we came in, showered, and went out to dinner at The Port of Call. Sue recommended a new drink, Kahlua and cream and that, combined with the hash we smoked earlier, made for a great meal. My Alaskan king crab in butter and wine sauce was especially good. Sue was a riot; she gets quite verbal when stoned and had us all laughing hysterically. Afterwards we played some backgammon and cards and then hit the sack. Sue might get up early tomorrow morning with Don to go bike-riding.
September 12th
Agony. My legs are in absolute agony. Today was the first full day that spent on the beach and in my hurry to finish reading "Aspen", I guess that I overdid it a little. You can't see anything yet, but my legs feel like molten lava was poured over them. Noxema helps somewhat, but not much. I probably would've spent the entire evening concentrating on them, but Alyce, Rick and Nancy showed up at 8:30 with an invite for us to go play miniature golf with them. Despite my stiffness I managed to win (!) and had a really good time, to boot...Sue and Mara left this afternoon and that really got me down. The 2 days that they were here seemed like a magical interlude out of the past, and their leaving hurt. I like Sue very much, personally, but more than that, she's the last link left to childhood.
And here I am, 37 years later, still enjoying vacations with Sue when she comes out to Sedona to visit and scrapbook!
September 13th
How do you say goodbye to one of the most perfect weeks of your life? It ain't easy. Sitting out on the porch a few minutes ago, alone, watching the stars and listening to the waves endlessly crashing on the sand, I felt like a character out of a novel, contemplating her future against the overwhelming backdrop of nature. I really wish that I were a poet, and not self-confined to these finite pages, scribbled in a half-awake state. But anyway, knowing that this time tomorrow night I'll be home again in Paramus, I want to write down a few "do not forgets": the little old lady and George, "It's OK" -- Beach Boys,"Boogie in the Back Row of the Movie Show", the sand crab races, screwing the cork out of the bottle, Sue's commentary on the people in the restaurant, relaxed and tense, "Chicken Man" ("he's everywhere he's everywhere!"), WJRZ, backgammon and backgammon and backgammon, Barry Manilow's new song and "I'd Really Like to See You Tonight" and everything else. it's been the best...
September 14th
So we're home again and I guess the full impact hasn't hit yet, 'cause I feel more tired than depressed. We tried to reserve the place for next year, same time, but the brother-in-law of the guy downstairs is taking it. We're supposed to call Lackey back in March to see what they can arrange for us...The damn thermometer seems to be broken, now of all times. I feel like I'm ovulating right now but my registered temp doesn't appear to want to go higher than 97.5. The whole thing is getting crazy...Stopped off at the vet on the way back from the kennel to get Kerri her heartworm pills. The spot on her tongue is only a freckle.
September 15th
Boy am I starting to itch. That's the problem with a tan/burn -- it doesn't stick around too long and then as your skin dries out you begin to scratch like crazy...Well, back to the salt mines today. Lo and behold, the place was still standing, and I managed to show up right in the middle of the mailing rush for the workshop invitations. I sorted zip codes until I almost went blind, but at least we're almost through. Don received quite a few compliment on his drawing...You know, my dreams are getting more and more psychic lately. I really oughta start that dream diary again.
These early flashes of understanding the bigger picture are so interesting. I actually don't remember ever keeping a dream diary this young but something must've been speaking to me. I wonder if it was at least partially sparked by being at the beach...
Laura called and we're gonna try and get together on Saturday, come hell or high water...Had lunch with Barb. She may come with us to Balto the weekend of Oct. 10th... It's not that easy being home again, but at least it's supposed to rain down there!
September 16th
I sure was pooped today. Maybe my body is trying to tell me that it just isn't ready for an 8 hour workday yet; it wants to go back to the beach. Especially since work has really become WORK. On top of everything else (did I tell you that I start reseach on cooking oil next week?), Aaron's given me the job of analyzing the data from questionnaires sent to 383 clients. Aren't they getting their money's worth though?..Helped Barb draft her raise petition letter. I enjoyed doing it and she really was grateful...The Schlengers called this evening and mentioned that the Eisenbergs will be moving into an apartment in November. Finally. Maybe we can start visiting them again...In the news: Mao Tse Tung died last week; Viking II's soil-scooping arm has malfunctioned; the Episcopalian church voted to ordain women as priests and bishops.
September 17th
Jesus, just what I needed -- to be involved in a car accident. no, don't worry; I'm alright (I think). At any rate, all that seems to be wrong is a general achiness and soreness in my neck, shoulders and back. Hopefully a weekend spent resting should fix that. It all began this morning on Paramus Road right near the Old Mill and the Cuss. There was a lot more traffic than usual and we were creeping along at a stop-go pace. I was nearing the light at Century, waiting for it to change, when WHAM, I get smacked from behind by some dodo who was probably fascinated with the emptiness of the swimming hole and therefore wasn't watching where he was going. We both pulled over and although I felt more disgusted than anything else, I still could hardly get it together enough to remember what info. to ask for.
I must've been more upset than I thought,'cause when I got to work I was shaking all over. Aaron advised me to check out any physical injuries first, and then report the claim to my insurance company. I hadn't felt anything at first, but 1/2 hour later I was starting to hurt a bit, so I got B. Berg to take me over to the emergency room at Valley Hospital. That's a whole 'nother story (boy do hospitals give me the creeps), but anyway the doctor didn't think that I had whiplash, but rather some very strained muscles. He did advise bed rest, so I packed it in for the day. I called the long distance claims # later on and gave them as much info. as I could. An adjuster is supposed to contact me soon, but I don't know what will happen with this Pedro Fernandez guy. I mean, why was his insurance ID card torn up into tiny pieces?
Wish I hadn't been so stupid about forgetting to note down the make and license # of his car. Anyhoo, here I am, still hurting on Sunday night. We tried to go back to Valley for some medication but they said I'd have to receive follow-up care from a private physician. They gave me the names of 3 orthopedists in Ridgewood. Wish me luck getting an appt. tomorrow. Meanwhile this thing's really gumming up the works as far as CB is concerned. I really can't afford to miss that meeting tomorrow afternoon. We'll have to see. Don has been fantastic. I don't know how I could've gotten by with out him. Funny, but when they say, "In sickness and in health" you never think about what that means...Saw "Hercules Unchained" tonight. Remember that one? What a gas.
Little did I know that this was the beginning of the end of this phase of my life. All these years later and I still feel the effects of the whiplash in my neck when the weather turns colder.
September 20th
Well, I've got it. Yup -- whiplash. Terrific, huh? Quite honestly, that was the last diagnosis I expected. I guess that I just didn't know that much about the condition. I went to the doctor's at 4:45 and he said that I had all the symptoms. Unfortunately, I can't take any medication because of possible pregnancy. I couldn't even have x-rays. I did have a collar fitted, though, that I have to wear just about all of the time. And physical therapy sessions 3 times a week for 2 weeks. I was really depressed when I left the office but I feel better now. I'm still worried about Don's ability to hold up under the pressure of my convalescence what with his exam and all, but I'll try not to let that bother me.
September 21st
What a pain in the neck. It really is an awful feeling to have the muscles cramp up like that. By the end of the evening I'm ready to unscrew it and toss it out in the trash....Stopped in at work this morning. Dorothy talked me out of coming in before next week; she doesn't think that I'll become invisible in that short amount of time...PT was "interesting". The deep heat machine and massage were great. I only wish that the effects would last longer...Stopped at police headquarters to file an accident report and contacted the adjuster again when I got back. Seems that under "No Fault" they pay all the medical bills, etc. and the other company takes care of the car damages. Now all that's left is getting an estimate and having Fernandez and Geico pay for it.
September 22nd
Hullo. Did a bit of running today. Got the car estimate ($103.79), went to the bank, and returned the library books. Tried to pick out a few more but the pain in my neck wouldn't let me look at anything below eye level. When I got home I received a call from Betty's friend who said that her maid's friend, Helen, would be able to work here on Tuesday's. Helen stopped by later and I expect her to start next week...Don went to my first cooking class for me this evening and loved it! I'm looking forward to going.
September 23rd
Boring day. Just rest and heat. Had a 2:00 therapy appt. The "diathermy" treatment was relaxing, but I would've like a longer massage. Iwonder how much these sessions cost and if they're doing me any good...Peter was supposed to come over for a roast chicken dinner this evening, but I didn't have the where-with-all to keep sticking the thing in and out of the oven. He came over anyway, though, to work on his car, And Don picked some stuff up from Gino's. Peter sounded pretty good (he's in a group now) but I'm beginning to get a feel for how fucked up his childhood must've been...Don went out after dinner to do a little clothes shopping for a suit and to pick up some things for me. He sure is super. Afterwards we played some backgammon and watched the presidential debate. It was funny when the sound went off.
September 24th
What a painful, yet enjoyable night. Don took me out to dinner at The Carriage House in Allendale. It was a pleasant place and I really liked getting out of the house for awhile. Unfortunately, my neck wasn't of the same mind, and would have rather been at home resting on a pillow. Don's massage helped tremendously, but still, by the end of the evening at Syms, I was in tears. I seem to be improving to the point where I feel no pain when I'm lying down, but I can't hold my head up in public (ho ho)...Fall was really in the air tonight. The temps dropped, the air was crisp, and we even saw pumpkins along the road. And boy is it getting dark early; by 7:30, I believe. Wow...Barb stopped by and it was good to see her. She had some good Haven news: Wayne Saucier is engaged and Bruce Foss has a job!
September 25th
Aw shit. Just when I was beginning to count the days, that ol' blood-tinged discharge shows up again. Damnn it all. Despite the resulting inability to take medication, I was really looking forward to the possibility of being pregnant. I hadn't thought about it much 'til the last few days, but then I started reading baby books again and hoping. I understand and agree with Don's reasoning of why this wasn't the month, but I still worry a little bit -- you know, about my ability to conceive. But the signs keep improving every month, so 'til next time...Don brought home some wine, cheese and pepperoni for a little "picnic" before dinner. He also bought me a card. I love him! We took a walk in the park with the little nut, and after dinner went out to look at another suit for Don.
September 26th
Boy am I scared. We just watched the 1st half of the TV special, "Earthquake" (with the sound in stereo!) and I'm really shaking. With that rumbling and all, it sounded so real! Yeah, the day wasn't exactly what the doctor ordered in terms of rest and relaxation -- we also watched a Colt game that was an incredible cliffhanger. Unfortunately we managed to lose it in the last 6 seconds, but I can really see how people get heart attacks while looking at those things. Despite all that tension however, today was the first day that I noticed an overall improvement in my neck. Good sign, huh? Don made some chicken salad for dinner from last night's leftovers which I enjoyed, despite some general nausea and crampiness afterwards. I wish I knew what the hell was going on with my body.
September 27th
"Rainy days and Mondays..." Well,we had both today, and truth to tell, I was a little down this morning. Somehow, when you're away for a week, you expect everyone to be anxiously awaiting your return, while in actuality they've been busily steaming ahead without you. So I guess I feel a little rejected or something. My neck held up pretty well all morning and the doctor seemed encouraged, although he did say that I still felt pretty tight. I came home around 2:00, just in time to see the exterminator start exterminating. Hope the ants stop marching one by one...Don's been so wonderful lately; he's due for a blow-up. Hope I can manage to keep it all in perspective.
September 28th
Our maid, Helen, came today. (Boy does that sound weird.) Gladys, or Catherine, would sound more familiar, but still -- our own maid! I sure could get spoiled. It felt a bit uncomfortable having someone else straighten out your personal stuff and all, but it was nice having the house clean again...Stan stopped by to drop off the new research stuff (salad oil, yet!) and I've decided that I'm calling it quits after this one if the Center doesn't cough up my money...Had a really nice dinner at Fulton's Folly in Harrington Park. One thing about those 2-for-1 books, they really get you to see the county. I'm enjoying it...Cooking class tomorrow; hope I feel up to it. May work just a half day tomorrow.
September 29th
Strange day today. Went into work the regular time and managed to make real headway into the client questionnaire analysis until the sound of drilling (they're putting in a sprinkler system) and my neck forced me to quit. Ate lunch at Howard Johnson's with Barbara and got into a good rap about relationships, dependency, vulnerability and defenses. It was the first time that we've ever discussed things together at this level and it was both exciting and scary. I hadn't realized until now how I've managed to insulate myself from rejection, under the guise of self-sufficiency...Went to the Chinese cooking class tonight. What a strange group of people. I couldn't do much, of course, but the meal was absolutely delicious. I was fascinated with the cellophane noodles and the tea was especially good. Think I could ever do that?
September 30th
Another strange day. Maybe it's the weather changing that makes things seem so weird. It's hard to say. Anyhow, I wasn't really feeling up to par today. My neck hurt more than usual and I just didn't have my customary bounce. By the time I left at noon, it had turned colder and looked like rain, and all I wanted to do was climb into bed...Made an appt. with the lawyer that Fred recommended last night, for next Tues. I'm about ready to sue for all I can get.
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