I'd like to condition myself to write down at least one thought a day... Goddamit, I hate the sight of telephone wires and power cables strung up for miles and miles. They uglify everything. Put 'em underground!
Iron Butterfly put on quite a show at Columbia the other nite. They not only brought the crowd to their feet, but to the foot of the stage as well. Boy did the management personnel ever sweat up a storm trying to keep the kids from mobbing the group during Inna-Gadda-Da-Vida. It was crazy! They even summoned a few squad cars but luckily everything remained under control. I had Dad's binoculars with me and even from the hill I could see every face on the stage very clearly. It was really exciting. For some nutty reason I had the feeling I was kind of "eavesdropping" as I examined the facial expressions and clothing of people some distance away. "Sunny Plaine, Secret Agent"! Don looked especially tuff in a shirt untucked over jeans. ("Masculine image"...) I enjoy seeing guys lounge around with a sort of easy-going casualness. Very appealing.
Part of what makes Rosewood "tolerable" these last 2 weeks is what I like to refer to as the "power of the keys". That familiar jingle and feel of cold, hard metal definitely makes me feel as though I own the place. Let's see...speaking of Rosewood...let's take my gang first. Beth -- I feel closest to her and I only wish that time allowed me to get to know her better. Perhaps I'll keep in touch with her from school. I'd like to keep in touch with everyone anyway, so maybe we can go back for Christmas and other holidays. Anyway, Beth kinda reminds me of my counselor, Janet Allen, from camp. Both are warm people and unselfish, although Beth is more dynamic. Cathy -- boy can first impressions be wrong ones! I took an almost instant dislike to her face because she looked quite stuck up, but as it turned out, she's the best worker (and that's quite a compliment since all the kids are tremendous with the patients).
Noni could be even more charming if she'd take off some weight. She has a sweet personality. John -- the summer's most wonderful surprise. Concealed under that shy, withdrawn exterior is a very sensitive, intelligent guy with an interesting sense of humor. He's damn good with the patients too. Sid -- oh well, you can't win them all. It's a shame that had to be spoiled by the laziness of Johnson and Rigney. I may not have been as tolerant of him as I've been had he not reminded me of Danny so much. At any rate, that brief 'love affair" is over and I'm not gonna hesitate to tell him where to go if he starts whining again.
Donna and Betsy -- I don't know them too well, but they seem like good sorts. I'm delighted with the group as a whole and I think that they're far superior even to last year's group. As for me, I've gained a deeper insight this summer and developed a necessary sense of humor in my work. My supervisor position has enabled me to widen my experience with different levels of retardation and I appreciate the efforts of the hospital employees more than before.
I became particularly concerned with the group of kids committed through court referrals because of "cultural deprivation" and eventually I'd like to learn more about the situation. In registering as a volunteer and taking out three Nursery 2 children with Don, I added another, more personalized dimension to my job. I swear that if I'm lucky enough to have normal children, I'll never stop thanking God for the miracle of their health. Most important of all, though, I've seen the look of love light up a cottage attendant's face as she gazed with pride at one of "her boys" splashing in the water.
Them Marcuses! Christ can they get on my nerves. Aunt Marilyn finally managed to get us to take her along shopping this Saturday although I honestly don't know how she did it. She and Sally repeated endlessly what wonderful, fun-filled afternoons they have when they go out. I had to resist the temptation to tell then how ridiculous they sounded. Oh well, I guess that they mean well.
August 28th
The next logical step following Harrad had to be Rimmer's most recent book, Proposition 31, about "corporate marriage"...
Again, I have pages of quotes that I'm not going to copy. But one of the strongest themes, for me, was the art and importance of effective communication.
"I want to be a real person. To be beautiful because I am me and there is no other me. To do my own thing in my own way, to find my own bag, to dream my own dreams. I want to look like me and do the things that fit me. No one else wears my size. -- Unknown
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